For
those of you who haven’t read the rest of my site, welcome!!! For
those who have, you can skip the introductory spiel in the next
paragraph.
I’ll
try to be brief then – but by way of background: This is the first
time I’d ever seen Queen play live, although I was born in 1962, was a
great fan of theirs as a teenager, and, on the face of it, lived through
years of opportunity to go. However, the fact that Queen was the music
that I was most involved in when, at the age of 15, I lost my mother to
cancer, and with the unenlightened treatment of and attitude to this
tragedy which typified that seventies era, I ‘lost’ Queen’s music,
which became locked in a sort of time warp. This went on for years,
until finally, in 2002, a set of circumstances came together which led
me to make a journey back to deal with the events of that time, in a way
that I hadn’t dealt with them before, and the associations that
Queen’s music still held for me helped me to do that. This tour, then,
in which the band has found a way to play live, and at the same time in
Freddie’s honour, took on a special relevance for me from day one.
Like others, I certainly never thought it would happen; that I would
have this ‘second chance’. But here it was…
You
better lose yourself in the music, the moment
You own it, you better never let it go
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime ..... yo !
Eminem

Hurry
put your troubles in a suitcase
Come
let the new child play…
Brian
May – 'Long Away'
Me
on the station waiting to set off. (Photo by my daughter, Georgia -
thanks!!!)
My
Day
One
shaft of light that shows the way
This
is going to be my day
Though
it can be won by no mortal man
The
way things have moved, there must be a plan
A
road, long and winding, has led me here
Some
things you can’t change but there’s nothing I fear
Nothing
in the world can take it away
Left
standing no more – it will be my day.
A
Kind of Magic - Roger Taylor
The Long and Winding Road - The Beatles
The past, the present and the future are really one
– they are today.
Harriet Beecher Stowe
Georgia and I set out on the train to the south London flat
where her father’s brother and sister-in-law live. Arriving early in
the afternoon, there was time to write the above poem and have a little
snooze. Georgia was supposed to take a picture of me before I left, but
she absconded with her cousin Barbara and I had to set up this shot
myself, which I managed to do thanks to the fridge freezer in the
kitchen which proved just about right for a camera prop!

About to set off on the day of my dreams – me in my
Queen II (!!!) T-shirt (purchased from the fan club, of course!)
(Thanks to the free hire of Grace’s fridge freezer
as a camera prop!)
So off I went, heading first for the Prince Albert pub, where I was
unable to locate Jacky, who, I later found out, had been held up in
traffic. However, there was a friendly crowd there wearing a variety of
T-shirts and regalia. I sat in the pub garden with my glass of white
wine, thus avoiding the cigarette smoke. Some Queen music had been
promised but was notable by its absence. I hadn’t listened to any
Queen all day, in fact, and was suffering from withdrawal symptoms!
Still, I’d soon be compensated! I hadn’t arrived at the pub until
about 6.20, and in the course of my time there, the pub emptied rapidly
(must change my deodorant! No, it MUST SURELY have had more to do with
wanting to be well in time for doors opening). So I wasted little time
in drinking up and leaving myself. I was, however, concerned that I
might have pangs of hunger and thirst once inside the Academy and the
evening was underway, so I stopped off at a Chinese supermarket to buy
some lotus paste pastries and a bottle of iced tea, and made my way to
join the queue outside the front of the Academy, although the exact
position I should stand wasn’t clear at first as there were two
queues. There were programme-sellers outside but at £12.00 each I
wasn’t going to bother this time – my memories of this evening would
be enough.
Finally, after seven, when the doors opened, the queues started to
move. The guy controlling the rate of entry happened to stop the queue
when I arrived – it gave me the opportunity to take this photo:

And I listened in to the conversation he was having with the
people behind me when he gave the exact capacity of the venue – just
under 5,000. Suddenly, he gave the go-ahead, I thanked him, and moved
towards the door to collect my ticket. That part went very smoothly, and
I finally had The
Ticket in My Hand,
and replied ‘I will’ most resolvedly when the guy said he hoped I
would enjoy the show. Now I
was through, there were no further barriers – this was a time of great
inner joy.

When I finally got into the stalls area of the auditorium, I chose an
area facing the right of the stage as the audience view it – partly
because I would be near the Ladies’ but also because I figured that
this was the area of the stage where Brian would stand most of the time
and, as I’d never seen him in person before, it would be great to have
him in my line of vision!
I got talking to a guy next to me, henceforth to be known as ‘my
neighbour’ and we whiled away the considerable length of time by
chatting from time to time. As he asked whether I’d ever been to a
Queen concert before, I told him my story very briefly, always aware
that it sounds a bit daft, but he appeared to understand – or at
least, I don’t think he was just being polite – there’s a lot more
understanding about this sort of thing in general these days. I gave him
my website URL and said he would visit. So if you have visited and read
this, thank you very much for looking after my place while I went to the
Ladies! Also, I hope you’ve enjoyed the site if you’ve had the
chance to read any of it!
We’d probably been standing there for over an hour when a note
started to sound. It might have been the first note of ‘One Vision’,
but it held as it was for ages and ages, sometimes fading, at one point
accompanied by a twinkling of keyboards; later on the audience piped in
with a Freddie-type ‘DAY-OH’ or ‘Why are We Waiting?’ at which
point – as if by response – some percussion…
As I stood there all the minutes this was going on, I became aware
that at that point, I could be in any time I wanted to be, and at any
place too – but there was truly only one place and time I wanted to be
in right there and then, and that was here, and now. God sure does work
in mysterious ways!
As patience around me started to wear thin, I shrugged, making a
remark to my neighbour that I had waited 28 years and another few
minutes wouldn’t matter. He joked in reply that he hoped it wouldn’t
be another 28 minutes!
Eventually, the note started to vibrate in my heart. But then it
stopped, and suddenly broke into Eminem, and thanks to my daughter’s
love of hip hop, I recognised this as the song from which Brian had
quoted on his soapbox earlier. (See the four lines at the top of the
page). I started to dance and rap along to it, at least those four
lines, which I was able to express in a way that was loaded with their
full meaning at that place and at that moment.
When it was over, Paul arrived on stage in front of a curtain, and
started singing ‘Reaching Out’. Suddenly, from nowhere, Brian
appeared, playing alongside him, at which point I gasped in surprise –
and then the curtain fell to reveal Roger drumming and the rest of the
band – the other two guitarists – Jamie Moses and Danny Miranda
(bass), and Spike Edney on
keyboards. The music broke into ‘Tie Your Mother Down’ which sounded
perfectly amazing and paced on with such energy that I was breathless by
the end of it. There really was only one drummer on stage! Realising
that we'd actually only just got to the end of the second number, I was
wondering how I was going to make it through the concert! Not to mention
that lot on stage – but there was no let-up! ‘A Little Bit of
Love’ and ‘I Want To Break Free’ – Paul letting us take over
part of the vocals – followed. The inclusion of this song had been
greeted with surprise after Fancourt, but there may be at least two very
strong reasons for it. First, it was composed by ‘Deaky’, and
history may very well yet judge it as his most successful song. Second,
the lyrics themselves hold poignancy for the situation Queen were in –
finally breaking free from all those years of deadlock and out on the
road again…
Then Paul asked ‘Any fat-bottomed girls out there?’ and some of
us were certainly able to answer ‘yes!’ with glee – and gratefully
disallowing any thoughts of a possible breach of today’s painful
Political Correctness, I did my own fat-bottomed dance along to it! Then
Paul accompanied himself on acoustic guitar for the first few bars of
‘Crazy Little Thing Called Love’, by the end of which the whole
venue was whirring, although I’m not sure that those in front of me
had much room to dance!
Then things quietened down a bit when Paul sang ‘Seagull’, Roger
emerging to play bongos. Next, Brian sat down with his acoustic guitar
and started to hold a cheerful, confident and cosy ‘fireside’
monologue – he said that the fact that the spirit had been kept alive
was partly due to them, but also to us. He asked ‘Can you believe that
we’re doing this?’ and I think he answered his own question by
saying ‘it’s a miracle’ and going on to boast that he could play
anything he wanted to – we settled on ‘’39’ by cheering! – (
yes, we could hear the call
many years away!) Then a
song which was always done as a trio - ‘Love of My Life’-
Freddie’s song, performed in the past by Freddie, Brian and the
audience – was now a duet, with Brian and the audience carrying each
other along in memory of our missing third member.
Then came an interesting version of ‘Hammer To Fall’ which I’d
first heard on ‘Rock Radio’ the previous weekend. It started slowly,
with Brian, Roger and Jamie on harmonic vocals, finally breaking into
the well known rock pace of the song when Paul took over the singing. It
was great to hear that historic last verse performed here live – it
had been cut out of the musical, but still has a great relevance for
some of us!!!
After that, Brian started on his guitar interlude, moving from front
stage to back, standing against the background of a video. On the
commentary of ‘It’s a Hard Life’ on the Greatest Hits II DVD,
Brian stated that that video had been a ‘Freddie indulgence’. Time
now for a Brian indulgence! ‘And we indulged him…with pleasure, I
have to say, really…’ The video led us through London traffic to a
point where he knew that he was standing outside the Dominion – we
moved on to the front of Buckingham Palace, and climbed up the walls,
knowing very well where he was going to end up! Just in case there were
any doubts, we finished up out in the galaxies with exploding
supernovas, and all the time, the incredible sound of the Red Special,
accompanied later by Roger’s drumming, filled the auditorium. It was
simply amazing. This had been Brian’s journey, which, in many ways
I’d shared, but in a different way and for different reasons.
Then Roger came to the mike he said it was like a family reunion!
I’m glad he recognised me as one of the family despite my long
absence! In fact, I feel that other Queen fans had managed to party on a
massive cruise for many years – I’d been there too, but somehow
managed to sleep through it. On awaking, I had to backtrack on
everything I’d missed – often by looking at someone else’s view of
it, until I got to set up this site. Now, for the first time in all
these years, I had my own memories to add to those of my teens. It was,
in fact, some of my teen memories which were shown on the black and
white footage of the 1975 tour to Japan which provided the backdrop for
Roger’s first vocal on ‘These Are The Days Of Our Lives’. There
were cheers when the first pictures showed
‘Deaky’ and then Freddie. Towards the end of the song, Roger
ended the line ‘I look, and I find no change’ with a chuckle while
his left arm was extended to present Brian.
We joined in ‘Radio Ga Ga’ in the usual hand-clapping way –
such a wonderful song – the vocals were taken over at the end by Paul
- then rocked along to ‘Can’t Get Enough of Your Love’. The next
thing that happened I found quite extraordinary. Roger drummed up the
introduction to ‘I’m In Love With My Car’ and I thought
‘What’s happening – who’s doing the vocals – not Paul
surely?’ – he was nowhere to be seen. Then when Roger started
singing along to his drumming I was so shocked that I was lost for the
first few lines and wished I could have asked him to start again! I seem
to remember sending off my suggested set list with the word PLLEEAASSE!
next to this song, but I’d never had it in mind that Roger would be
doing more than singing it, although I had no idea who might do the
drumming. I really thought those days of him drumming along to his own
singing were over – I really thought I’d missed my chance in life to
see this, but I hadn’t! Although
I wasn’t thirteen and him twenty-five now – I’m forty-three and
he’s fifty-five – that didn’t matter one bit in the course of that
song – and if I could say that one moment meant more to me personally
than any other during that concert, this was it – salvaged from my
tragically marred teens, gift wrapped, and presented to me thirty years
on – this was truly compensation at last.
‘I wrote damn thing’, Brian stated to introduce his own vocals
for ‘I Want It All’, which was followed by Paul singing ‘A Kind Of
Magic’ – both songs sounded great. Then Brian asked ‘Ready,
Roger?’ – I didn’t hear the reply, but it was taken as a
‘yes’, and footage of Freddie singing Bohemian Rhapsody appeared on
the screen, Roger drumming in front of it – an amazing sight – and
sound. After the harmonic piece, when pictures of Freddie, interspersed
with some of ‘Deaky', were shown, Paul appeared on the stage singing
the last piece, which was now completely live with Brian on guitar, and
as the song built up towards its close, I remember Paul standing on the
edge of the drum stand, microphone stand held high in one hand. This was
a triumph on behalf of Freddie – and, after the gong at the finish, I
could freeze-frame that moment in my head with the three of them there
– Paul on the left, Roger centre behind the drum kit with sticks
extended aloft in his right hand in front of him, and Brian to the
right, guitar lowered, acknowledging the adulation of the crowd. I
displayed V-signs for victory towards the stage, thinking at the same
time that I intended the reverse to anyone behind me who might still
pour scorn on this. At the same time, venom-spitting
words I wrote to those newspapers at the beginning of the year fly
into their place one by one on Brian’s letters page – have those
people now finally got what this is all about? I believe it was also at
this point that my neighbour remarked that Spike was ‘grinning like a
Cheshire Cat’ – I was grateful for the commentary as I wasn’t
quite tall enough to see that far over to the left of the stage!
Fittingly, the next song was ‘The Show Must Go On’, which was
followed by the two encores – one with songs from ‘Paul’s side’
– ‘Feel Like Makin’ Love’ and ‘All Right Now’ (it definitely
was!) and the well-seasoned Queen finale of ‘We Will Rock You’ and
‘We Are The Champions’. It was at this point that I decided to try
to take some photos. I took one but it turned out really blurry, then
held my camera up, preparing to take another. Then – just for a second
– but it can’t have happened (or could it?) because I was not very
far forward – my eyes met with Brian’s, and he made what appeared to
be a deliberate move over to pose next to Paul. I had
to take this one, even if I had imagined the whole thing (a bit
blurry, though!)

Finally, I took one more. This was the best one:

The last four songs all lived up to the excellent quality of the
concert. I think that I wanted to cry during ‘We Are the Champions’
– I think I managed a sniffle – but I had done most of my crying
before tonight, and this wasn’t a time for crying, but to victory over
adversity which is contained in the message of this song. Years ago,
Brian had admitted, as young men, they had fallen about laughing when
Freddie first presented this song. Who would have thought then what it
would come to mean? For everyone here, but for me personally - I was
carrying a living hell at the time it was first released. Maybe it’s
the point that I could I suggest that the ‘losers’ referred to in
the song are the doubters.
So it ended – the six of them lined up – to the background of the
National Anthem, a moment like the ones I’d witnessed on footage of
the finish of other concerts. Most of the time I had my eyes on Roger at
this point – he just kept smiling that wonderful smile. It wasn’t a
moment for a crown or royal regalia but Queen the live band were back
again.

Picture:
George Chin - www.georgechin.com
I was glad to see that most of the press were positive about the
concert, finally showing some perception as to what this was all about.
I could, from the beginning SO see where Brian and Roger were coming
from on this – yes Brian, if my logic
was too much for a certain newspaper then there were reasons for
that. There was the strong parallel between my curtailed adolescence and
Queen’s curtailed careers, and in both cases, the world as we knew it
had been ripped to pieces by a premature death.
In many ways, the lead-up to this day had not been easy. When I first
wrote my story on this site I said that the fact I’d never seen Queen
play live was a source of regret, but so what? This was, of course,
written against the background of the fact that at that point it was
never likely to happen. After the tour was announced the whole sequence
of events and the way things moved suggested to me that there was a
special connection between this tour and my own story. Having
dealt with something that should have been dealt with years before -
‘facing the music’ in the truest sense, and the passage of time had
hardly made it any easier, I heard Brian talking about the tour on the
radio, excitement and enthusiasm unbounded. I was cheered to hear that
Freddie's mother had added her blessing to their venture. There
have also been other problems very much in the forefront of my life
recently. Seeing Queen isn’t going to solve these overnight, of
course, but I feel an old burden has now been lifted somehow. That’s
what I’ll take away with me in order to gauge the way ahead.
They played with such a sound that ensured they would be heard in
Heaven. In fact, I never thought I’d hear such a sound produced
outside Heaven! ‘Ready, Freddie?’ – mum, Vicki? Could you all hear
them? ‘Gitarrendonner’ – ‘guitar thunder’ as a German
newspaper article described it. Paul’s voice was out of this world
too, and he twirled that microphone stand in exactly the way he
wanted. Truly, this was a night way beyond my dreams and I shall
never forget it.
My writing ©2005 Now-Im-Here.com